Blonde in taxi

-No. no, Dont, enough, dont do it again!
Shout blonde in the taxi, she just did not know word "stop".

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Naked blonde stops taxi.
-Madison Avenue, please! -She said. When taxi stops, driver start starring at her.
-What are you looking at, don't you ever see naked women?- She asks.
-I did, but I wonder, where from will you get money.

Joke about circle of trust

-What does it mean, if you asks somebody "How do you do", and he says I'm fine?
-It means you are not in his circle of trust.

Decisions, decisions, decisions

Nervous man come to psychologyst.
- Tell me, what is your job?
- I am sorting oranges.
- Tell me more.
- All day, down the chute oranges are sliding , I am standing at the bottom and sort them. Big in one basket, medium in other and small in third basket.
- So why are you nervous? You have a calm work!
- You dont understand, all day I have to make decisions, decisions, decisions!

Jokes about halloween

If you date on halloween, remeber
People usually chooses a mask reflecting his inner being.

Joke about blonde on heels

Husband: Why are you wearing so high heels, you cant walk.
Blonde: You told me you like tall girls.
Husband: I like smart girls too.
Blonde: Thats why I am wearing glasses.

Joke about Blonde prays

Blonde is praying to God.
-Oh, God, please make me smart I am so unhappy in my stupidity.
-Unfortunately I can't make blonde smart, but because of your belief I will make you happy.

PREGNANCY TEST

Husband wanted to gag his wife, draw 1 stroke on the pregnancy test.
Wife: -Honey, what means 3 strokes on pregnancy test?

Blonde and credit cards

Blonde: Could you imagine- our dog roasted all my credit cards.
Husband palming dog:  good dog, good dog!

Jokes about man and woman

-What is the most useful thing in the holding?
-Guilty husband!


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-Why on the world women are more than man?
-Because there are more need in cleaning up than to think.

Jokes about dying

-When he died he left all his treasure to orphanage.
-And what is this treasure?
- 12 children.

Joke about bank

-Why your bank are hiring idiots to collect money?

-They are easier to catch later.

Jokes about court

Judge:
-When did you see victim last time.
Blondie:
- In the night from 28th to 1st.
Judge:
-In which month?
Blondie:
-You wont believe .....

Jokes about doctors

-Nobody understands me!
-What you mean?
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-Doctor I will not pay to you, I included you in my testament, is it ok?
-Of course, just give me back your recipe, I will make some changes.

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-Doctor, I have a problem, little man is sitting in my head and cursing. Could you help?
-Of course, it will cost you 10 000 dollars.
-Doctor, do you want to know, what little man just said?

Jokes about helpdesk

-Hello, is this technical support?
-Yes, how can I help you?
-Which browser is installed on my computer?
-Well, if you asks certainly it is Internet Explorer.

Broken kitchen

Husband returns to home and see in the kitchen- everything is broken.
-Whats happened?
-Nothing special Mr. Propper fights with Mr. Muscle.