She did not eat any sweet or salty or fried or fatty, and died of envy.
***
- Girls! A problem with the hair on the legs are fixed. Let them grow!
(Adele: Let them burn)
***
Husband: Imagine you have a dream car, but every month it have a week of preventations and two weeks before it cant drive because it waits for that preventation.
Wife: And why should I keep that car... wait a minute... what are you hinting at?
Blonde is walking through the desert.
Blonde is walking through the desert.
Blonde: "God, please give me some water, I am thirsty, no, stop throwing that shovels on me!"
***
To have entertaining chat with blonde, all you have to do is to nod silently from time to time.
***
Q: "Where is your boyfriend?
A: "He did not pass the test"
Q: "What test?"
Blonde: "God, please give me some water, I am thirsty, no, stop throwing that shovels on me!"
***
To have entertaining chat with blonde, all you have to do is to nod silently from time to time.
***
Q: "Where is your boyfriend?
A: "He did not pass the test"
Q: "What test?"
What is worst- wife don't like to cook or wife can't cook?
Q: What is worst- wife don't like to cook or wife can't cook?
A: Worst thing is -wife like to cook but can't.
***
Women's bra is like bag of chips- open it and half are empty.
A: Worst thing is -wife like to cook but can't.
***
Women's bra is like bag of chips- open it and half are empty.
Who is afraid of rain in room?
During discussion with blonde, if you are armored with logic, facts and clear mind, you are dead end.
***
Do I look like fool?
Of course not, silly!
***
Blonde:I need IPhone 7th.
Seller:Wait a minute, there are only IPhone 5.
Blonde:Don't know about you, I lost my sixth.
***
Boy: Why do you have an umbrella?
Guess who: In case of rain.
Boy: Who is afraid of rain in room?
Guess who: I am not afraid , I have an umbrella!
***
Do I look like fool?
Of course not, silly!
***
Blonde:I need IPhone 7th.
Seller:Wait a minute, there are only IPhone 5.
Blonde:Don't know about you, I lost my sixth.
***
Boy: Why do you have an umbrella?
Guess who: In case of rain.
Boy: Who is afraid of rain in room?
Guess who: I am not afraid , I have an umbrella!
How Blonde can break a leg collecting leaves?
Question: How Blonde can break a leg collecting leaves?
Answer: Easy, by falling from the tree.
***
Question: How can you know is relationship serious?
Answer: If they are taking mortgage loan together.
Answer: Easy, by falling from the tree.
***
Question: How can you know is relationship serious?
Answer: If they are taking mortgage loan together.
Who wrote fairy tale about mermaid?
Professor: Who wrote fairy tale about mermaid?
Blonde: Anderson
Professor: But name
Blonde: Pamela?
Blonde: Anderson
Professor: But name
Blonde: Pamela?
Hold the wheel!
He: Stop dancing!
She: Why?
He: Just, please stop dancing!
She: Why, it's cool music!
He: Please, stop dancing, hold the wheel!
***
Blondie1: Did you break up with your boyfriend?
Blondie2: No, he said, according to law I have to do my duties for two weeks until he finds a replacement.
She: Why?
He: Just, please stop dancing!
She: Why, it's cool music!
He: Please, stop dancing, hold the wheel!
***
Blondie1: Did you break up with your boyfriend?
Blondie2: No, he said, according to law I have to do my duties for two weeks until he finds a replacement.
What you mean no cigarettes?
Blonde in supermarket:
Blonde: Give me some cigarettes.
Seller: we have no cigarettes.
Blonde: What you mean no cigarettes?
Seller: It's the same thing as we have cigarettes, only in reverse.
***
Ordinary bears think that white bears are fool.
***
What an ugly girls get out from beauty salon. I think they are donors- donors of beauty- salon can't make beauty from nothing so it suck it out from those girls.
***
Woman who don't want anything from you can take away everything.
***
The snake bites soldier John. Doctor says somebody have to suck out poison. Buddies found nurse and said:
" Hurry John is mocking, you have to suck out or he will dye."
After some time buddies come in to room and see blonde is sucking in the wrong place. They ask:
"John why did not you tell her to suck in other place."
John: "To hell with life, I never feel better."
Blonde: Give me some cigarettes.
Seller: we have no cigarettes.
Blonde: What you mean no cigarettes?
Seller: It's the same thing as we have cigarettes, only in reverse.
***
Ordinary bears think that white bears are fool.
***
What an ugly girls get out from beauty salon. I think they are donors- donors of beauty- salon can't make beauty from nothing so it suck it out from those girls.
***
Woman who don't want anything from you can take away everything.
***
The snake bites soldier John. Doctor says somebody have to suck out poison. Buddies found nurse and said:
" Hurry John is mocking, you have to suck out or he will dye."
After some time buddies come in to room and see blonde is sucking in the wrong place. They ask:
"John why did not you tell her to suck in other place."
John: "To hell with life, I never feel better."
Most kind blonde in the world
There are found most kind blonde.
She buy live fishes and let them free.
In the woods.
***
In San Francisko took place competition of most stupid name. Winner named Winner took the first place.
***
My wife says I am too impulsive. How could she know, we just met yesterday.
***
Q: Was he alone? Are you shure?
A: Yes, I can count very well to 1.
***
She:That's it. I am leaving you.
He:Who are you and why did you came here?
She buy live fishes and let them free.
In the woods.
***
In San Francisko took place competition of most stupid name. Winner named Winner took the first place.
***
My wife says I am too impulsive. How could she know, we just met yesterday.
***
Q: Was he alone? Are you shure?
A: Yes, I can count very well to 1.
***
She:That's it. I am leaving you.
He:Who are you and why did you came here?
Life is full of misery
Life is full of misery and suffering and hatred, disappointment and betrayal until finally you find a hairdresser that was right for you!
***
Joka about stupid blondes invented blondes themself. It is so convenient what can you demand from the fool.
***
The blonde in forum asks,
- Does anyone take drivers licence sixth time? What surprises lurk there?
***
Joka about stupid blondes invented blondes themself. It is so convenient what can you demand from the fool.
***
The blonde in forum asks,
- Does anyone take drivers licence sixth time? What surprises lurk there?
Ride is cancelled
Husband: I am going to Hippodrome.
Wife: Ride is cancelled I already hit the snout of your filly.
***
Piter: John, yesterday I took my girlfriend to "Otello"
John: "Ah it was cultural event!"
Piter: "No, it was warning."
Wife: Ride is cancelled I already hit the snout of your filly.
***
Piter: John, yesterday I took my girlfriend to "Otello"
John: "Ah it was cultural event!"
Piter: "No, it was warning."
Lets get married!
Blonde: Lets get married!
Boyfriend: I don't want to marry, I want to eat!
Blonde: What a silly boy, you can eat up at the wedding.
***
Boyfriend: I don't want to marry, I want to eat!
Blonde: What a silly boy, you can eat up at the wedding.
***
Operation "Clean hands"
Operation "Clean hands" : searching for man without wedding ring.
***
Blonde: Why did I tell to unknown hairdresser "Surprise me!"
***
Q: Is it ok backpack for 15 years old kid with Mickey Mouse?
A: In 15 years it is ok with skull of Mickey Mouse.
***
Blonde: Why did I tell to unknown hairdresser "Surprise me!"
***
Q: Is it ok backpack for 15 years old kid with Mickey Mouse?
A: In 15 years it is ok with skull of Mickey Mouse.
What are you thinking about, honey?
She: What are you thinking about, honey?
He: About nothing!
She: Me too!
He: It's easy for you, you have no brains!
***
He:Honey, what is that beautiful smell?
She: Perfume, you presented me yesterday.
He: I did not.
She: Oh you did, check your wallet!
***
If you cant whitening your teeth start to attend solarium.
He: About nothing!
She: Me too!
He: It's easy for you, you have no brains!
***
He:Honey, what is that beautiful smell?
She: Perfume, you presented me yesterday.
He: I did not.
She: Oh you did, check your wallet!
***
If you cant whitening your teeth start to attend solarium.
Do you have a boyfriend?
Blonde1 calls to Blonde 2
Blonde1: I see your boyfriend with fat ugly chick, I will take a shot in case.
Blonde2: Actually it's me...
***
Waitng for performance blonde ate cake from the inside.
***
He:Do you have a boyfriend?
She:Not exactly.
He: Not exactly a boy or not exaclty a friend?
Blonde1: I see your boyfriend with fat ugly chick, I will take a shot in case.
Blonde2: Actually it's me...
***
Waitng for performance blonde ate cake from the inside.
***
He:Do you have a boyfriend?
She:Not exactly.
He: Not exactly a boy or not exaclty a friend?
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